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2010 PALGN Awards - The Winners Announced!
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Cody Giunta
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PostPosted: Wed Jan 26, 2011 11:16 am Post subject: 2010 PALGN Awards - The Winners Announced! Reply with quote

This time of year is flush with awards and celebrations. Yesterday saw the announcements of the Australian of the Year Awards, and today sees the announcement of this year’s Academy Award nominees. But for PALGN, it is perhaps the 2010 PALGN Awards that are the most anticipated of all. This year saw new members arrive, other members reduce their presence and a lot of hard work from staff and mods. Most importantly, perhaps, are the contributions of everyday forum users, which these awards are mostly about.

Everyone who wins an award is entitled to wear the sig bars which segax kindly volunteered to make. This year’s winners may have some that you could have guessed, but there are also plenty of surprises to come to, some which will arrive very shortly, perhaps within mere moments.

And now, for absolutely no reason whatsoever, I give you Crank!


Last edited by Cody Giunta on Wed Jan 26, 2011 2:33 pm, edited 1 time in total
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PostPosted: Wed Jan 26, 2011 11:18 am Post subject: Reply with quote

Ladies and gentlemen,

Many of you may be baffled as to why I am presenting these awards. I can only say that some things are best left unexplored, much like the strange smell emanating from your reclusive neighbours tool shed or that mysterious buzzing coming from your grandmother's bedside table.

I have been guarding the names of the winners for almost two days now, ever since a nameless man with a briefcase handcuffed to his wrist delivered the list to me in an empty underground carpark. He made me swear a blood oath not to reveal the names of the winners early and gave me a photo of Julian Assange, just in case he came sniffing around.

Once I had the list, my team of a thousand monkeys on a thousand iPads start writing the jokes. I ended up having to do it myself, however, because all they do is play Fruit Ninja all day. It's like I always say: pay peanuts and you get monkeys, maybe an elephant or two. That was a bad day at the zoo and I am definitely not welcome back.

I started writing in ernest. Ernest was quick to object, but I got the job done anyway, despite the lack of room. And now, I present to you, Part One of the Annual PalGN Awards, 2010 edition!*

*(Internet connection required)


For the worst post or thread of the year

We begin today's proceedings with the Facepalm Award. We briefly considered changing this to the Double Facepalm Award, so adept was the winner at causing our hands to seek out our faces in exasperation.

It's Esposch!

To be fair, much like the humble lab rat, who eventually learns not to eat the electrified food pellets, our winner does appear to have grown an increasing distaste for the flavour of his own foot and places it in his mouth less frequently with each passing day.



The best of PALGN threads in 2010
Who doesn't like Role Playing Games? She was a nurse, I was a doctor doing charity work in Rwanda. It was a hot, moonlit night... what? Oh, not that kind of Role Playing Game... sorry. We'll as you've probably guessed, the winner is...

Memoirs of an RPG Gamer!

From RPGs to JRPGs, to MMORPGs and beyond, who doesn't like a good acronym. And the games are darned good, too, with vast stories, quirky characters and epic quests, getting lost in a good RPG is truly one of gaming's greatest pleasures. So, who actually wins this award? You all do! Everybody who contributed to the thread played a part in making it PalGN's Thread of the Year.

Nonetheless, a special mention has to go out to Kyle Clarthy, as one of the most popular contributors to this thread. As a result, Kyle has reached Level 42. New skill acquired: Wicked Slap Bass.

And now, the runner up. It began as a gambling addiction, but soon became a cottage industry and minor art movement in it's own right, possibly changing the face of PalGN signatures for generations to come...

Mick Saige's Spoons for sigs!


Take a bow, Mick. Now bet it on 5...



The finest photos taken by PalGN members

If the next winner offers to take your photo, don't be alarmed. It's not like the time you met that guy from the modelling agency, who offered to help you with your portfolio, only for your artistic photos to end up in less than tasteful magazines.

It's A13x!

In all seriousness, A13x has shown us some stunning photography over the last year. What he can't do with a telephoto lens is probably not legal anyway.



The PALGN member who displays sig making skills unlike any other

When it comes to the creation of sigs, one man has displayed a talent no other can match. Though initially driven by his gambling demons, this gentleman's artistic output now rivals some of MS Paint's great masters. The man behind the sigs behind the man is...

Mick Saige!

Runners up in this category are admeister and BurnZ.



For the most outstanding use of money in 2010 as displayed in the Newest purchases thread

He buys a lot of stuff. And just when you think he has spent all his money and bought all the stuff there is to buy, he buys more stuff. Where he puts all this stuff is a mystery, but that is just as well, because it is all gaming related stuff of the highest calibre. Could we possibly resist dropping in on him and relieving him of his stuff, should we discover the whereabouts of said stuff? It would be like trying to resist robbing a bank vault full of Magnum ice-cream...

Come and get your award seyismyname! Lord only knows where you will have room to put it...

Runner up for this award is certainly no slouch in the bargain finding arena. Step up Blast Hardbody and take a bow. We applaud your second-hand shopping skills, you are a Zen Master of the art.



The best new member in 2010

We've had a lot of new members this year. Many of them turned out to be the same person and promptly got banned. One new person, however, stood out amongst all the other persons.

It's Mick Saige!

Whether it be his beard, his love of a fine cigar or his MS Paint skills, Mick has touched the hearts of all of us at one time or another. Anybody who says he has touched anything else is either a dirty, rotten liar or very lucky indeed. We all love you Mick, don't ever leave us. We would miss your manly scent too much.

Runner up in this category is a lightweight, weighing in at 662 posts, averaging 3.5 posts per day, posting out of Melbourne, Australia... Spacecow!



For the most stylish avatar and signature combo

The PalGN forums are no stranger to style. In order to stand out from the crowd, you need to really make your mark. One member has done just that. You could say he has marked his territory, but that would probably be misconstrued.

The winner is BurnZ!

This well dressed young man always has his eye on the fashion of the day. You wont catch him wearing an outdated sig or avatar, not even in private. The only person who even comes close to his all pervasive sense of style is...

Runner up, Mick Saige!

Enough said.

Well, that's all from me. Stay tuned for Part Two of the PalGN Awards, coming any minute now... I am reliably informed.


Last edited by Crank on Thu Jan 27, 2011 1:44 am, edited 1 time in total
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PostPosted: Wed Jan 26, 2011 11:28 am Post subject: Reply with quote

Score:
4

Vote:
M@TT_K
chibiandy
grim-one
Matth3w
Mick Saige, undeniably applicable for everything
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Cody Giunta
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PostPosted: Wed Jan 26, 2011 11:30 am Post subject: Reply with quote

And now I’m back, but for the briefest of moments to give out another award, and many thanks to Crank for being a special guest host on this occasion. I’ve spent this time deep within the bowels of PALGN to ensure that the final counts for a lot of awards are accurate, and boy is it a close contest this year. Perhaps there isn’t any category that could be closer this year that the award for the Most Sexy PALGN member, for it is an astonishing three way tie!

Firstly, winning the category consecutively now is PixieGirl!

Matching PixieGirl this year is one whose combination of red hair, stylish afro and a mischievous grin makes him perhaps more deity than man, it is Karai Pantsu!

And then there’s this man


Though I will be back later to give out some more awards, there shall be an intermission of a few hours. When next we return, there will be yet another special guest host. Who might it be? Here’s a hint:

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PostPosted: Wed Jan 26, 2011 12:04 pm Post subject: Reply with quote

Score:
0

Vote:
Congrats to all! icon_cool.gif
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PostPosted: Wed Jan 26, 2011 1:57 pm Post subject: Reply with quote

Score:
2

Vote:
Karai Pantsu
Esperino
Karai IS a sexy beast.

Congratumalations to all winners so far!
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PostPosted: Wed Jan 26, 2011 3:33 pm Post subject: Reply with quote

Woo, I am a snappy dresser. icon_y1.gif

Thanks for the votes everyone. <3
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PostPosted: Wed Jan 26, 2011 3:45 pm Post subject: Reply with quote

Ooh thanks guys icon_smile.gif

Fixed:




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PostPosted: Wed Jan 26, 2011 3:47 pm Post subject: Reply with quote

Firstly, I'd like to congratulate all the winners so far. And all the past winners. And I'd like to send a big old lovely shout out to all the voters, without whom none of this would be possible. Well, it would be possible, because Cody is probably making up the winners as he goes anyway... but thanks regardless. Lastly, I'd like to thank YOU. Yes... you! The readers. The writers. The plussers. The neggers. The backbone of the PALGN society. You're all winners. Except some of the members are better winners. You know?

Here are some more of these better winners:


For the PALGNer who did the best Harold Holt impression.

PALGNers come and go. Parting is such sweet sorrow. Except when people leave PALGN, they just up and disappear, leaving us to wonder forevermore whether it was us or them. It's probably them. We miss them anyway. I know a lot of people definitely miss the all around awesomeness that came from this particular individual:

The winner is Charly!

I'd congratulate you but you're not here.


Moving right along... it seems that somehow I have been given the pleasure of announcing the fanboys, which is interesting considering I spend most of my time on PALGN these days above the line (the one that says Gaming Forums). That said, there are certain individuals who carry with them the stinky, unmistakable scent of fanboyism wherever they may roam. You can smell them coming from a mile away, even in the Entertainment and Creativity forums. Here goes nothing...



A lot of PALGN members are big Nintendo fans and quite a few remember the days before Sony and Microsoft, when Nintendo and Sega were the big two. Granted, a lot of members remember a time before Nintendo consoles, but nobody cares about our old asses. Anyway... this year's Nintendo fanboy begs the question: Does personal bias get in the way of objective criticism? I mean, would you give a pedophile a job at a kindergarten?

The winner is Jarrod!

Try to stay out of the sandpit, mate.

Runners up: BurnZ, Cody Giunta, Kyle Clarthy!




The winner of this award is always around to give us helpful information about upcoming SONY releases, with videos, images and just that right amount of fanboyism to boot. You can't deny his allegiance to all things SONY.

The winner is THEMAN!

Congratulations... now come up and collect your trophy!

Sometimes I think the runner up of this category only uses his PS3 for Blu Ray viewing. Then I look around the Gaming Forums and see him everywhere: discussing this, defending that, trash talking PCs (icon_wink.gif)... stick to your guns, mate. Especially that Dragon Sniper.

The runner up is ANDYBALLINA!




It's gotta be hard to be the spokesperson for a company whose name is made up of the words micro and soft, but there are a few on here who won't let the size of the boat affect their motion in the ocean. Arguing over your ex's box is never really going to get you anywhere, but this guy will always have his say regardless:

Congratulations LeonJ!

Runner Up: Spanca!




Some people like PC games. Some people say things like "I crave to get into this beta." There's a clear distinction there. I'm starting to wonder if people become fanboys because they become PALGN writers, or do they become PALGN writers beause they are fanboys? This whole thing is rigged.

The winner is Denny!

Runner Up: A13x!




I guess what makes you a good writer/arguer/debater is your ability to speak (nay, type) at length about something you are passionate about, while ousting haters, blocking heretics and continuing to stay intelligent throughout. You've all read at least thirty two lengthy diatribes by today's winner of the Alan Jones award... and you enjoyed EVERY word.

Congratulations, again, to Denny!

Oh look... the runner up is ALSO a staff member. *cough* rigged *cough*

Runner up is Jarrod!




Haaaang on... hang on. Wait up. I forgot there was a staff award. Isn't the thousands of dollars per article you guys get enough? I see now why I am presenting these particular awards - "Oh yeah, lets give it to a mod - it will look slightly less suspicious." Yeah, sure thing.

But seriously, I think the most important prerequisite for all PALGN writers is their ability to be punny. It's like a competition to find the baddest, most cringe-worthy play on words imaginable. The winner of this award is no slouch when it comes to making us slouch over and collapse in fits of hysteria (and not always due to funniness).

Congratulations to Cody Giunta for his take on the Fresh Prince of Bel-Air theme song!

Cody Giunta wrote:
Nintendo Store Update - 10/12/2010 Now this is a Story all about how my Cave got flip-turned upside down, and I'd to take a minute just sit right there, I'll tell you how you can all download it on WiiWare.


Oh, the guy counting the votes won this award? Haha. Of course he did.

Runners Up: Adam and Jarrod!


Thanks to Cody for passing on some of the writing duties. Thanks again to everyone for voting and helping to continue this annual PALGN tradition. Happy Invasion Day!
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PostPosted: Wed Jan 26, 2011 3:51 pm Post subject: Reply with quote

Best achievement of my life. Thank you, PALGN. I will ensure to make more fucking retarded comments come 2011!
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PostPosted: Wed Jan 26, 2011 3:54 pm Post subject: Reply with quote

A big thank you to theory for his guest host duties, and thank you all who voted my work as blurb of the year . I really have to give credit to Adam for inspiring my insistence in puns and Jarrod for writing what I personally considered to be the best of the year for his Epic Mickey blurb. Now, on with the show!

When the world is filled with doom and gloom, those who elicit great laughter from us all are highly valued. This year's Comedy King is able to bring the lulz in so many ways, from shoops to sigs to references to Richard Nixon,

The winner of this year's Comedy King award is Mick Saige! BurnZ was voted by you all as the runner up.

Like anywhere in life and on the intertubes, it can be a difficult task to find the right rhythm in posts and reach a truer potential of oneself as presented online. To honour those that have done the best to improve their posting online we have the Most Improved Member award.

In a stunning juxtaposition given an earlier award win and comments directly above me, PALGN has voted Esposch as the most improved member of 2010. It’s also worth mentioning that this young tapir got more votes in this category than the other in which he already won. Son, I am proud!

PALGN has a breadth of members whose combined knowledge on gaming makes others rightly tremble in absolute awe. In the end, however, there was only one member who was voted as the most knowledgeable of all.

This year, the award goes to Denny! In the runner-up stakes is PALGN’s resident Nintendo fanboy Jarrod.

The great forum of PALGN can be a difficult place to manage, but there are those among us whose task it is to keep the community safe from spammers, spoilers and other shenanigans. Occasionally they will have to utilize the might of the banhammer. To one of these people we award the title of Mod of the Year.

The winner of the Mod of the Year award has truly been tireless in his efforts and it showed in the voting, as they received the most votes for anyone out of any other category. At one point, ten people in a row voted this man as the winner. The 2010 Mod of the Year is none other than Sin Ogaris

And now we come to the final award of the day and the most anticipated and prestigious of all, the Member of the Year. All of those who are up for contention for this award have made an outstanding contribution to PALGN in 2010 and are recognised by their peers here as such. It was an incredibly close race right up until the end, where the lead changed several times. I can reveal that the runner up Member of the Year is none other than Mick Saige.

The 2010 Member of the Year was applauded for many things this year. Some said that they think he grew a lot over the past year, and appreciated his willingness to be so open about himself personally. Others applauded him for single-handedly keeping the RPG thread alive and reaching new heights. Still more people gave him major kudos for simply being a great poster and a great person.

It gives me great pleasure to announce that the 2010 PALGN Member of the year is.....

PALGN wrote:
KYLE CLARTHY!!!

Congratulations!
And that’s it from me and the 2010 PALGN Awards. Congratulations to all of today’s winners and a big thank you to everyone who voted. It was fun to run and I hope that you will all be back next time!


Last edited by Cody Giunta on Wed Jan 26, 2011 5:36 pm, edited 1 time in total
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PostPosted: Wed Jan 26, 2011 3:57 pm Post subject: Reply with quote

Esposch wrote:
Best achievement of my life. Thank you, PALGN. I will ensure to make more **** retarded comments come 2011!


It's already 2011, but at least you're standing by your words.
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PostPosted: Wed Jan 26, 2011 3:57 pm Post subject: Reply with quote

No awards for Ciel?! He is a palgn god.
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PostPosted: Wed Jan 26, 2011 3:58 pm Post subject: Reply with quote

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Vote:
No comedy award?
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PostPosted: Wed Jan 26, 2011 4:00 pm Post subject: Reply with quote

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congrats to the winners! Hopefully next year I win meself a award.
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PostPosted: Wed Jan 26, 2011 4:03 pm Post subject: Reply with quote

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BurnZ wrote:
No comedy award?


Mick Saige had already won too many categories.
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PostPosted: Wed Jan 26, 2011 4:04 pm Post subject: Reply with quote

And congrats to Kyle Clarthy as well, you deserve it. Even though you'll come on here and say that you don't.

BurnZ wrote:
No comedy award?


Crank deserves to win it hands down I reckon.
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PostPosted: Wed Jan 26, 2011 4:05 pm Post subject: Reply with quote

GanstaChick wrote:
congrats to the winners! Hopefully next year I win meself a award.

Most banned, wilko?
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PostPosted: Wed Jan 26, 2011 4:08 pm Post subject: Reply with quote

Congrats to Kyle Clarthy, well deserved. icon_y1.gif

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PostPosted: Wed Jan 26, 2011 4:09 pm Post subject: Reply with quote

SONY. Right.

Don't forget to preorder these AMAZING PS3 exclusives this year. Including GOTY 2011 UNCHARTED 3.


KILLZONE3
LBP2
YAKUZA 4
YAKUZA OF THE DEAD
DC UNIVERSE
Mortal Kombat with KRATOS

ICO Collection
SORCERY
SOCOM4
DISAGEA 4
INFAMOUS 2
RESISTANCE 3
RATCHET ALL 4 ONE
PS MOVE HEROES
JOURNEY PSN
PIXELJUNKSHOOTER2 PSN
LAST GUARDIAN





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PostPosted: Wed Jan 26, 2011 4:14 pm Post subject: Reply with quote

Woo, sexy award 2 years in a row icon_biggrin.gif although a 3 way tie. Whatever it still counts. icon_razz.gif Congrats to all the other winners! and my single vote ended up being a winner so yay for me and the person I voted.
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PostPosted: Wed Jan 26, 2011 4:17 pm Post subject: Reply with quote

Ctrl F: Benza

... ahh fuck you all then icon_razz.gif

Grats to everyone that won. Mad Props to Espoch for most improved, he deserved it.


[edit]
Quote:
DC UNIVERSE

Hardly an exclusive.
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PostPosted: Wed Jan 26, 2011 4:20 pm Post subject: Reply with quote

Score:
1

Vote:
Esperino
Great work Kyle! icon_smile.gif
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PostPosted: Wed Jan 26, 2011 4:27 pm Post subject: Reply with quote

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1

Vote:
Esperino
Congrats to all the winners!

THEMAN wrote:
Don't forget to preorder these AMAZING PS3 exclusives this year.
JOURNEY PSN
PIXELJUNKSHOOTER2 PSN

Don't be silly, you can't pre-order PSN titles.
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PostPosted: Wed Jan 26, 2011 4:42 pm Post subject: Reply with quote

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ZeroX03
Apologies for the omission of the comedy king award folks, put that down to a bad copy pasta on my part. The winner is mick saige and burnz is the runner up.I'll edit my write up to include it in about an hour when I get to a property computer.
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